Rolling with It

A friend of mine posted something on social media the other day, and like everyone else in these crazy times, we’re all a little triggered lately and seem to have a strong awareness of our own individual pet peeves. My top three are:  1). the sound of chewing 2). When people change out batteries or ink cartridges and leave them lying around so I have no idea if these batteries or ink cartridges that are lying around are any good, and 3). I never seem to know where my dust pan is. If you take it for fx sakes bring it back!

My friend’s pet peeve in her own words was this: “Don’t you just hate how people will post the most mundane sh*t they are doing with their day? Like geez Karen we get that your a basic bitch. Anyways… I’m off to feed my grass then might wipe off my counters.” Yeah… I know, a little harsh but she did not leave anything open to misinterpretation. So this is my dilemma, I don’t want to blog any more about Covid 19. I’m over it! So, that only leaves me with option number 2, posting about mundane sh*t and being a basic b*tch.

Yet… life had other plans for me and I must make an important announcement.

I interrupt this blog post, to announce that I am going to be a grandma. Ha! Who wants to read the blog post of a grandma? Yes, I found out on Mother’s Day that I am going to be a grandma. My husband is older than me. I’d like to say MUCH older than me, but only older by about four years. He has three grandkids that have been calling me grandma to my husband’s delight over the last few years. So, in a way, they have prepared me for this day. My oldest daughter is now with child so now, I am legit, LEGIT going to be a GULP…grandma.

I am excited that we are going to have another boy in the family. Considering that my son has been the lone man standing in a slew of sisters for awhile now until my daughter’s husband, Josh joined the family. There is something anxiety inducing about your baby having a baby and there is also that nasty Covid thing that I don’t want to talk about, that most undoubtedly has the upper hand right now and is raining on everyone’s parade.  I won’t allow it.

I also won’t allow my anxiety or my vanity to get in the way of experiencing joy. Nobody wants to be the Snow White witch looking in the mirror freaking out that someone’s else’s youth is stealing their thunder or that their fertile fields are becoming a parched valley.

I’d like to think all new grandmothers go through a slew of emotions, joy included at this new threshold, and for any who say they don’t, I’d have to wonder if they are liars. I’m quite aware that the years behind me are gaining. My current Covid-19  “do” is to put my hair in two braids and wear them like that for a few days. I’m completely aware that my braids are not as thick as they used to be. For some reason, I’m even more aware of this now that I’m becoming a grandmother.

I talked to my husband about this and it was weird to express my new vulnerability, because I thought that this may be an issue that just impacts women. I asked him if he went through any kind of a “funk” when he found out that he was going to be a grandpa and he just said , “Yeah, of course! but you get over it.” Case closed.

So yes, I am “transitioning” into another phase in my life. New pathways, a new role, and I’ve been a mother to four and basically two sets of children. Two older girls, a gap, two younger children, and now being an “official” grand mother in addition to the two left at home that I am still raising. When May 26th comes around, my two youngest will officially both be teenagers. Ahh… a lot to take in. A lot more in addition to just being your basic “Karen,” wiping off the counters, and feeding the grass.

The good news is that if I were any fortune teller worth their salt, my fortune would read, ” I see a Hawaii trip in your future.” I would like to believe so,  if this blasted CO-V does not get in the way. I’m in my angry phase right now. I’d like to just punch this Co-V right in the face. I have zero tolerance for such nonsense at this point.

Anyway, I had high aspirations of writing an exciting blog post about all the ways I’ve now become basic doing all the basic things.  I’ve even thought about writing a “basic b*tch” cookbook out of spite. Take these homemade chicken noodles for example. If there is one thing I know, it is how to be a “basic bitch.” There should absolutely be no reason why I can’t run with it but I just thought I would mention that I’m going to be grand mother too.

So, my friends the world is full of happy little surprises. I am a firm believer that when something of value is taken, it always comes back in another form. So much has been “stolen” from me over the past few months and this could very well be the gift.

A bridge has been built that I must now cross over and another bridge was built on Mother’s day when me and my own mother spoke on the phone because quite frankly, I was wondering if it would even happen. Mother’s Day can have a lot of different meanings for so many people and mine fell under the banner of, “it’s complicated.”

My daughter’s news allowed me and my own mom to share a moment we might not have had. We are all connected in this generational line up and this was a subtle reminder that connected we shall remain. Thanks to this new breaking and developing news.

The meek can make things strong. Sometimes I don’t think the grandest things come from firestorms but from places unexpected. Who knew a virus found in bats in dark caves across the globe could bring the world to it’s knees? Just “going with it” has become my new mantra. Just go with it, and sometimes “just going with it” is the best solution because that is the only solution one has. Going with the flow can take one to the most unexpected places. It will be interesting to see where the next few months take me, this new grandma role, blessed baby boy, Covid 19 and all. 

I am busying myself preparing for all that is ahead, potential travel plans, trying to boost my vitality, health, and finances in a health and economic crises no less.  I am daydreaming about Hawaii and this new man cub when this virus wants to whip me into submission, and me of course, trying to roar in it’s its face telling it that it can’t have everything while considering what is best for everyone.

Also, another variable, my daughter’s husband may be deployed for six months, one month after their baby is born. This has revved up the cost benefit analysis when weighing choices on the scale and which risks are worth taking in comparison to my daughter undertaking something of this magnitude in isolation, and alone far from everyone.

A lot to think about, a lot to unfold. If only I could see into the future. So many if onlys. Time shall tell and time passes on and don’t I know it! The rest remains to be seen but yes, thank you for reading and sharing this journey, and allowing me a brief moment to announce some momentous news. My cup doth runneth over, and as always writing has always provided an outlet to reign in such overzealous emotion.

A huge congrats to my daughter and her husband Joshua. I can’t think of two greater warrior spirits who are better equipped to take on life’s challenges and this has given me a great deal of solace in a sea of unknowns. Yet, hasn’t life always provided unknowns? There is no need to be overly intimidated by these ones. I refuse to allow a wretched virus any satisfaction. Outwit, outsmart, outlast (intelligibly of course). This is my new motto. Until next post!

Rachelle Whiting